Couples, Cars, and Wolf-men

Sometimes I get this obsessive need to express my opinions about life and people to someone but I know that if I were to do such a thing, the chosen individual would stop listening because the thoughts would spew on forever. It gets frightening sometimes, the thoughts that plague my mind. Diseased as my thoughts are, I find hem valid reflections of our society; mostly.

So, while I have the undivided attention of the computer screen, and undoubtedly the attention of my classmates sitting around me due to the clacking of my fingers across the keyboard, let us begin.

First, let me just start by stating that often times I may look eternally pissed off and you may think that my dour stare is a reflection of my feelings toward you, but I assure you that more often than not, my scowl is subconscious. Apparently my face adopted the look as a reflection of my views on society. I mean seriously, people these days are ridiculous. I'm not saying I'm exempt from this category, because trust me, I do some stupid stuff sometimes, but for the most part, I try not to be cliche.

Now, onto the subject of people. Why do couples find it necessary to take up the entire staircase and make it virtually impossible to pass innocently by to make it to class just so they can hold hands. I mean seriously people! I'm already sick and tired of the fact that you people have to make it public knowledge that you are indeed taken, but show some courtesy if you insist on holding hands and walk single file! You stretch, you've got joints and rotator cuffs to enable your arm to extend behind you. If you're wearing a puffy coat, whose problem is that? Certainly not mine, so please, let your girlfriend walk in front of you, because heaven forbid she's behind you. You might lose her if she's not within your sights! Really, if you're going to walk hand in hand down the stairs, and you feel the overwhelming desire to walk side-by-side move aside for those of us that must get somewhere on time.

Also, I've noticed that attractive men tend to travel in packs. Like wolves. I find wolves to be a handsome and majestic creature. Like attractive men. Well, I was at work yesterday and as I was walking out, I ran into this guy (literally, I was texting and walking. It's just as dangerous as drinking and driving) and he complimented me on my dress and my hair. Flattered, I struck up a conversation with him as we walked, and he told me he was meeting up with a bunch of his friends in the food court. Perfect! My car was on that end anyway, so I continued to converse with him until we reached his friends. A pack of attractive men. OOOOOOOHHHHH yes. But alas! Handsome sir that had talked with me for so long reached the group and slung his arm around a blonde blue-eyed skinny little hipster brat and my world came to a screeching halt. They were all with girls. Hipster chicks. Why is it that handsome men such as he always have that hipster girlfriend? For real people. Can't you just date girls like me? I'm not hipster, and I'm not skinny. Definitely not blonde, but I'm still just as fun! In fact, if you will allow me to be quite narcissistic for a moment I'm probably a lot more fun than those little girls. Probably have more of a personality too.

Moving away from the subject of how woefully single I am and onto the subject of cars. Specifically men that work in mechanic shops. I know what I'm talking about when I come in looking for parts for my car. I'm not stupid. And don't you think that just because I'm a girl I don't know anything about cars or what my car needs. Sure, there are moments where I learn something I didn't know, but when I come in looking for something, it's because I know I need it. Guys, please don't be offended if I know more about my car than you do. I like cars. I really like cars. Don't treat me like I'm stupid, don't ask me stupid questions. Do what I tell you and we can be friends. Thanks.

For now, I think that's enough for you poor invisible readers. I know no one reads this blog, but, I write anyway.