You're Looking Particularly Hipster Today, Alex

Hipster.

Has this word become so integral in describing a particular person or an idea that we can't be original anymore?

Especially in fashion. I've noticed that people are all beginning to dress in a similar way which makes people like me (who dress in whatever they feel like that morning) look like slobs. Now, I'm not saying that I look like a slob. I think I dressed myself quite well today. Gray skinnies, black combat boots, a black canvas jacket and my lovely Captain America tank.

I think I look good. But hipster? Really? What defines a hipster? Seriously, it makes me wonder. Sometimes I want to be "hipster" because they dress pretty sharply. At least the men do. Hipster girls are a different story. Defining a hipster is hard because if you define them, they automatically lose their "hipsterness" because you've put them in a category with other people. If that's the case, then why do we even call people hipsters? Seriously, people can dress however they want because that's their own personal fashion choice. I don't need to be called hipster because of the way I dress, and neither should anyone else.

Oh, and you're not hipster if you're trying to dress like the others.

Hipster is in and of itself a stand-alone category and it can be whatever the person wants it to be.

So don't call me hipster. I'm just being me.

Here's how I feel about the hipster trend:





This is what's going to be on TV next. We're running low on ridiculous and scripted reality shows, right? UGH, don't even get me started on the stupidity that is reality television.

Cheers!

"Hey, baby you wanna?" No.

Let's talk about something that has been bothering me lately:

The need for men to treat women like nothing more than an object of desire. A sex toy. Property.

I mean you name it, and people have probably treated me like that, and I'm just curious as to why? I will admit that in the past, that was the image I put out. I wanted to be desired and wanted that kind of attention because I thought that was the only way to be close to someone. That was, and still is, after all what the media portrays as desirable. And men want that. But none of the right ones.

I've noticed lately that even as I started to clean up my appearance by wearing less revealing clothing and keeping myself out of situations or places where the men that want nothing more than to take some poor girl home and sleep with her only to forget about her in the morning. Does this somehow make you cool? Is it a point of pride around your friends in the same way that having your team win in the Superbowl is? I'm honestly curious. But anyway, back to my original point. I've noticed that even though I have made this change in my appearance, people still treat me like that. Everything about their manner of speech, or their interactions with me (either via text/Facebook or face to face conversation) always leave me wondering what I have done to make them think talking to me like that is okay.

Sure, I'm flirtatious by nature. I've always known that about myself, but people I've never met before always have something sexual to say about me. Do you talk like that around/to other girls? Do they give off a "hey I'm looking for a good time," vibe? Am I unwittingly doing the same?

But for real. Girls, don't put up with that. I'm getting sick and tired of it myself. We deserve respect, and if they refuse to give it, don't give them the time of day.

I'm not going to stand for the "how bout you and me go somewhere private," or "let's do such and such a thing, naked."Or just the looks that people give me when they say something sexual. Pisses. Me. Off. I don't know what I've done to make them think this, so if you have any ideas, or this happens to you, please tell me. I'm honestly curious.

What happened to the concept of monogamy?

If you really care about someone, you call them your friend, don't treat women like that. Same goes for girls. Don't treat men like they're a piece of meat. And don't let them treat you like that.

Respect yourself, and they will respect you.

If they don't, kick them to the curb.

Quickly.

Baby Steps

I'm terribly sorry for not posting for so long. I was going to post on Valentine's Day, but didn't because I knew the whole post would have just been anger at the couple world and all the stupid things they have to do for each other. So today, I want to write a post dedicated to all those single girls out there.


The other day I had a moment with friends (a really long moment) where there was lot of talk about being comfortable in your own skin. I can't say that I'm preaching to you, because that's not at all what I'm doing. I struggle with this same thing just as much as anyone else does. In fact, I think that this is more for myself, than anyone else. Sometimes it's just easier to rehash things again just to sink in the point.

While I was hanging out with these guys we got onto the topic of conversation of my ex. I don't think I can technically call him an ex since we never actually dated. We just hung out and shared a mutual interest in each other. So anyway, enough of that. They told me that he was no good for me, and I got to feeling sorry for myself and then one of them stopped strumming at the guitar and looked up at me.

"Are you happy being single?" He asked.

It made me stop and pause. Was I? 

I should be able to say yes. That's what I want to say. But truth is, I don't think that at times I'm perfectly comfortable with being single. There are times where it's the best thing in the world because I can do whatever I want and not have to think about another person. Now I'm not saying I'm going to go out and let it all hang loose and do whatever floats my boat. No, that's not it. I'm just saying that without concern for someone else you can travel, you can enjoy things one moment at a time.

There's something though, and I know it nags at all of us (single folk), about being that one person who seems not to have anyone that cares.

False!

And that's exactly the point these guys were trying to make to me.

You always have someone there that cares for you. You're never alone. And until you're happy with just you, you can't be happy with someone else.

So, I'm making a promise to myself, that I hope all of you can do the same, that I'm going to be happy with myself. No matter how hard it may be, or how lonely I might feel. I'm going to push through because one day, I'll find the person I'm meant to be with forever.

Baby steps.

Green, the Color of Envious Men... Women too.

Jealousy. The Little Green Monster. Envy.

And many more.

It's a feeling that grows within me in the days preceding Valentine's day. Or rather, Single's Awareness Day. I haven't ever really enjoyed this holiday, and that's not because I just haven't had anyone to share it with, but because of those who do have someone that need to make it painfully obvious that they're not single. I know I can't let that bother me, just because I have no one to hang out with on V-Day (which isn't going to be true tomorrow. I'm hanging out with Amber!! I'm so excited) but again, those people that have someone that make it obvious.

Then there's the overwhelming feeling of inadequacy. And again, jealousy. And I guess it's not just the fact that I'm jealous of the couples, but I start to get jealous of everything. So and so talked to him. So and so called her. So and so did this, or that etc.

And for what? I mean, what's the point of this feeling anyway? What good do for us anyway? It makes us grumpy and sad and beat ourselves up. For something so stupid as a boy.

Boys suck.

They're really the root of all problems. And you thought Pandora had something to do with the evils in the world. WRONG. It was all because of men.

I hate this feeling. Now excuse me while I battle it.

Mullets Make Girls Cry

Mullets.

What makes men think they're okay?

I don't understand why men think they're so cool if they have an ugly tuft of hair growing out of the back of their head. The mullet should have been left in the 80s. Strike that. Mullets should never have existed. Period. They're nasty! And dear Miss Katy and I concur that the mullet is the worst hair style any guy could ever sport.

Please, they look greasy and unkempt if your hair is straight, and if your hair is curly, it looks like a rat crawled up your neck and made a nest there. No one wants to run their fingers through that ugly mess! The mullets are just as bad a plague as the leggings.

Most of the time they can't even do the short part of the cut right. Not that a mullet should be done at all, but still. If you're going to do it, get that part right at least. Please? I don't understand why people still think they're cool. I mean I know there are still people in the South that don't know the Civil War has ended, and therefore the people who still sport mullets must think they're some sort of badass and therefore the coolest thing that walks God's green Earth with that thing.

Please, for the love of all things holy. Curing the Mullet Disease is really quite simple. In fact, if you're suffering from this disease, I can cure you! I've got scissors!!

No One Wants to Talk to You. Stare at Beckham.

I almost needed to change my background today from this:

To this:




That pretty much sums up my day. I told myself that I wasn't going to text anyone just to see if I actually had people who wanted my attention. Turns out the answer is no. The only text I got all day was from Summer asking when our flash fiction assignment was due. That's it. And it was so hard not to text anyone. It was one of those times when you want to text that guy because you want a reason to smile at your phone when you pick it up. Well, besides smiling every time you see the handsome David Beckham... But, such is life I suppose. I can't take it as a reflection on who wants to talk to me, but still. It's a little sad that I don't have anyone to talk to unless I initiate the conversation.

So, perhaps I'll just fall off the planet for a while unless someone texts me first. I doubt I'll be able to do that, but I'll try it.

Judgement of Happy Valley

Happy Valley.

The Judgiest place on Earth.

Think I'm lying?

Today I decided to conduct a social experiment in my dress just to see the reactions I  got from people at work. Let me tell you, those reactions were priceless. I didn't think that people were as judgmental as they actually are down here until you test that power of judgment.

How did I do this?

I put on black fishnets, a short skirt and combat boots.

Boooooooooooy howdy were the looks nasty!

I didn't let it bother me because I knew that this was all for the express purpose of recounting my day for all my readers. I also laugh at the difference of the people I worked with and their reactions as opposed to the reactions of the customers and other individuals in the mall. My coworkers all commented on how fantastic I looked, and that my outfit was super cute/ sexy. I felt fantastic, and I think I looked fantastic.

The looks that "outsiders" gave me were another story. I saw it every time I walked passed someone. The way they met my eye and gave me a long once over, eyebrow raised and lips pursed. Every single time this happened I couldn't help but smile to myself. Most of the looks were the same, but there were a few looks that made me giggle on the inside.

One woman came into the store with her husband and young child and asked if we had any pencil skirts. At the time I had been standing behind a table fixing sweaters, and when I stepped out from behind it, her eyes grew as wide as golf balls and her jaw fell slightly agape. Composing herself, she cleared her throat and followed me back as I lead her to the wall where we had our pencil skirts. She thanked me and I left, but when I turned around I found her staring openly while whispering to her husband.

Who would have thought that people would judge so harshly? It was really ridiculous to me. But hey, it made for an entertaining observation.

I suggest everyone try something like this one day, and then you can understand just how it feels.

After the Storm comes the Sun

Life is such a fleeting thing, and it's not until you lose someone you never thought you would lose that this really hits you.

A friend of mine took her life yesterday. I can't say we were close, but it still hit me really hard. I put myself in the shoes of her older sister, and the flood of feelings that hit me were really strong. I can't imagine what it would be like to lose my younger sister like that. I would be absolutely crushed and unable to function. I don't know what I would do. Anger, sadness, and an emptiness would fill me. 

The rise in teen suicide these days frightens me.

Has life really become so awful that you can't just push on? I am no stranger to grief, a friend to sorrow, and a companion with misery, but still, I can see the light beyond the skyline. Life gets hard, and sometimes it looks like it's never going to get better, but is suicide really the only option? What is so incurable in life that makes it unworthy of living?

I suppose I might just be bitter about the whole thing because of those thoughts.

But this lead me to a choice about my platform for the scholarship pageant I am competing in. I want to somehow incorporate realizing one's true beauty in the prevention of teen suicide. Right now that's really broad, but I've got some time to figure things out. I think it's an important topic and issue in the lives of the people of my city right now.

Life is beautiful, and the sun shines brightest after the harshest storm.

The Legging Epidemic

Fashion.

For some, their entire life and wardrobe revolve around it. For others, you can only sit and wish that they cared just a little bit more. As someone who works in retail  and (hopefully) has a good handle on what works and what does not, I'm here to offer a little advice.

First thing's first. Ladies, if you're going to wear leggings as pants, may I offer some advice on when it's appropriate to do so? I'm not saying you can't wear leggings, because in all honesty, there are days when I really don't want to wear pants of the denim variation. Leggings at that point just seem more comfortable. BUT! I am consciously aware of the societal rules when choosing to wear them. Here's a breakdown of the questions you should ask yourself when thinking about wearing leggings.

1. Does this shirt cover my butt?
1. Yes: You may consider wearing a pair of leggings with it.
2. No: Find a real pair of pants, or a different shirt.
2. Does this shirt cover my crotch?
1. Yes: As long as your front and back are fully covered, you may wear a pair of leggings with this shirt.
2. No: No one wants to see your camel to, honey. Find a different shirt, or wear real pants.
3. Will anyone be able to see my underwear if this shirt is a little short?
1. Yes: For the love of all things holy, please do not wear patterned or lace underwear because that's not the attention you want. Make it black (or whatever color your leggings are) underwear. Don't have matching panties? No problem. Wear a thong. No underwear lines that way.
2. No: Congrats! You've chosen correctly and can go on your merry way!

I can't tell you how many girls I saw today twitching around campus wearing tight t-shirts and leggings. Most of them understand the underwear rule, but others that simply choose to ignore this rule (and wearing underwear completely) are in need of some serious help. And longer shirts. I don't need to see your camel toe.

Moving past the legging epidemic and onto a more grotesque problem. Dressing for your body type. This means one thing for us slightly curvier girls: Don't wear skin tight tops. They only make you look bigger! Now, I know people are going to think that I am being rude or insensitive, but that's not true at all. I am one of those curvier girls, and I will admit that for a while I wore the skin tight clothing. And then I complained all the time that I was fat. Well, that's because I was making it obvious that I was overweight. Then I started dressing for my curves, and it was a night and day difference. I'm not telling you to wear clothes that are going to make you look like a box, but try and find more flow-y or loose fitting clothing. Find something that will give you a waist but not cut you in half. And yes, I know that skinny jeans are really popular (and I wear them all the time) but sometimes you need to seriously consider whether or not you should wear them. Sometimes it's not the best option. BUT! A wonderful solution to those things we love to hate called "love handles" has been brought back to the fashion world. High-waisted jeans. Try a pair.

Now men, don't think you were going to get of easy here. I've got some things to say about your fashion choices too!

First, please please wear your pants around your hips. That's why they're there. I don't need to wonder how your sagging pants are still clinging to your body instead of sending you flailing to the floor like they should. And just because you're wearing an obnoxiously long over-sized box t-shirt that comes to your knees that you suddenly have permission to wear your pants below the hemline. That's just sad. You make it hard for me not to walk up to you and ask: "So, do you ever consider just omitting the pants and wearing only the shirt? I mean, your pants are doing nothing more than keeping your ankles warm, right?" Also, you just look like a douche.

Second, if you feel the need to wear a tank top, wear a tank top. Not a t-shirt with one stitch at the shoulder and a second at the hem. Again, you just look like a douche. If you still think you're cool enough to wear these sad excuses for clothing, you better look like Chris Hemsworth under that flap of material, and if you do, just forgo the shirt entirely. I appreciate a good looking half-naked man every now and then.

I, and I'm sure every other female out there, enjoy a man that takes care of himself, and cares (even in the slightest) about what he wears each day. None of this basketball shorts and a t-shirt every single day. That's like women wearing sweats made for men and a v-neck every day. Not attractive. Also, it makes you look like a douche and a player. If that's what you're going for, fine. Just leave me out of the equation. Thanks.

Gut Spilling and Radio Silence

Radio silence.

That's something that no girl wants to see/hear when admitting something. Like, oh hey, I find it rather hard to talk to you because you're attractive and I'm rather intimidated by your presence.

And then the silence.

Now, many people wouldn't see me as the kind of person that has a problem talking to attractive men. And honestly, I can talk to as many attractive men as I want, until that person actually means something. When I have become friends with the guy, it gets a lot harder to have a conversation with them. At least until a more comfortable relationship has been formed, I get soooooooo nervous around them. Just the other day I was asked by a guy that I find rather attractive why I never talked to him in person. So I told him like it is. I'm the kind of girl that says it like it is. If I find you attractive, you'll know. If I find you annoying, you'll know.

So when it came time for a response, nothing came. I think I literally stopped breathing for a moment.

And then a subject change.

Is it really so hard to tell me what you think of that statement?

I mean eventually he came around to it, but even then, the answer wasn't really one that made sense to me. Honestly, it took a lot of guts for me to say what I did, please don't just leave me hanging. That makes me feel as if I'm in the wrong somehow.

I know that I'm just over thinking the whole thing, but I'm sure I'm not the only one that ever feels this way.

Thoughts?

Couples, Cars, and Wolf-men

Sometimes I get this obsessive need to express my opinions about life and people to someone but I know that if I were to do such a thing, the chosen individual would stop listening because the thoughts would spew on forever. It gets frightening sometimes, the thoughts that plague my mind. Diseased as my thoughts are, I find hem valid reflections of our society; mostly.

So, while I have the undivided attention of the computer screen, and undoubtedly the attention of my classmates sitting around me due to the clacking of my fingers across the keyboard, let us begin.

First, let me just start by stating that often times I may look eternally pissed off and you may think that my dour stare is a reflection of my feelings toward you, but I assure you that more often than not, my scowl is subconscious. Apparently my face adopted the look as a reflection of my views on society. I mean seriously, people these days are ridiculous. I'm not saying I'm exempt from this category, because trust me, I do some stupid stuff sometimes, but for the most part, I try not to be cliche.

Now, onto the subject of people. Why do couples find it necessary to take up the entire staircase and make it virtually impossible to pass innocently by to make it to class just so they can hold hands. I mean seriously people! I'm already sick and tired of the fact that you people have to make it public knowledge that you are indeed taken, but show some courtesy if you insist on holding hands and walk single file! You stretch, you've got joints and rotator cuffs to enable your arm to extend behind you. If you're wearing a puffy coat, whose problem is that? Certainly not mine, so please, let your girlfriend walk in front of you, because heaven forbid she's behind you. You might lose her if she's not within your sights! Really, if you're going to walk hand in hand down the stairs, and you feel the overwhelming desire to walk side-by-side move aside for those of us that must get somewhere on time.

Also, I've noticed that attractive men tend to travel in packs. Like wolves. I find wolves to be a handsome and majestic creature. Like attractive men. Well, I was at work yesterday and as I was walking out, I ran into this guy (literally, I was texting and walking. It's just as dangerous as drinking and driving) and he complimented me on my dress and my hair. Flattered, I struck up a conversation with him as we walked, and he told me he was meeting up with a bunch of his friends in the food court. Perfect! My car was on that end anyway, so I continued to converse with him until we reached his friends. A pack of attractive men. OOOOOOOHHHHH yes. But alas! Handsome sir that had talked with me for so long reached the group and slung his arm around a blonde blue-eyed skinny little hipster brat and my world came to a screeching halt. They were all with girls. Hipster chicks. Why is it that handsome men such as he always have that hipster girlfriend? For real people. Can't you just date girls like me? I'm not hipster, and I'm not skinny. Definitely not blonde, but I'm still just as fun! In fact, if you will allow me to be quite narcissistic for a moment I'm probably a lot more fun than those little girls. Probably have more of a personality too.

Moving away from the subject of how woefully single I am and onto the subject of cars. Specifically men that work in mechanic shops. I know what I'm talking about when I come in looking for parts for my car. I'm not stupid. And don't you think that just because I'm a girl I don't know anything about cars or what my car needs. Sure, there are moments where I learn something I didn't know, but when I come in looking for something, it's because I know I need it. Guys, please don't be offended if I know more about my car than you do. I like cars. I really like cars. Don't treat me like I'm stupid, don't ask me stupid questions. Do what I tell you and we can be friends. Thanks.

For now, I think that's enough for you poor invisible readers. I know no one reads this blog, but, I write anyway.